Turning 9!

Alea and Macy (Alea's bff) have decided to do a joint birthday party again this year. Their birthdays are 7 days apart. This will be the third year they have had a joint party. Each year Julie (Macy's mom) takes pictures of the girls and we use the pictures to create a birthday card invitation. The girls dress to match the theme of their party. The first year we had a tropical themed swim party so the girls wore coordinating dresses and Hawaiian leis. Last year they had an American Girl themed sleepover party at a hotel. The girls both wore white capris and AG shirts for their pictures. They each had their AG doll in the picture with them and the AG dolls were wearing outfits that matched the girls. This year the girls want to have a hotel, swim party again. This year our theme is a photo booth party. Today Macy and Julie came over to our house and Julie took these pictures of the girls. I bought most of these props at Hobby Lobby a week or so ago. This was our must fun photo session yet. I hope to make a collage card for the invitation this year to use as many of these pictures as possible.

Happy 9th birthday Macy and Alea!

Their sashes say, "Birthday Diva".

Pittsburg, Kansas

It looks like my sister and her family might be moving closer to us. Can you guess where? Pat is finishing his doctorate in physical therapy in May. They were at our house this weekend after Pat went to a couple of different interviews. He has already been offered one job and expects to get at least one if not two more offers. They have been talking about moving this way for a year or two so it looks like Pat will take one of these positions for sure. They are heading home tomorrow and are going to start the process of wrapping things up in Texas. Pat will probably accept one of the offers next week or in the next couple of weeks. They have missed being closer to us, Pat's family, and their friends. Reed misses his "cousin Eda" and they want him to grow up around their families and friends. Davin and I were in this same position when we had Alea. We lived in Wisconsin for 6 years. I think this year makes 7 years in Texas for Bec and Pat.

What is going on here?

Today we planned on telling my family about our foster care plans. 

After we had lunch, did the Easter thing and the kids opened their birthday presents my mom suggested that Alea give us a fashion show with all the clothes she had given her. We were going to announce our plans to them with a "Big Sister" shirt that I got for Alea. Davin thought it was mean to my family to announce it like this but I thought it would be funny. (I had a feeling my family would take the foster care news much better than Davin's family did.) I helped Alea get a few of the clothes ready and then she gave us our fashion show. After she tried on the last outfit from my mom she went back into the bedroom and put on the Big Sister shirt. I came back out into the living room to see the 'show' and Alea came out a few seconds later. She said, "Here I come!" My mom said, "I think that is all I got her, isn't it?" Alea came out into the living room wearing this Big Sister shirt. My mom said, "Awww. That's cu...WAIT? What's going on here! Big Sister?! What?!!" My sister read the shirt and said, "SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" (Gotta love living in the south.) She screamed with tears in her eyes, "Are you pregnant!?" while I was shouting, "I'm not pregnant! It's not what you think." Everyone was talking at once in a good way. My dad kept saying, "What's going on here!?" When I got them to understand that I wasn't pregnant (which really only took about 2 seconds) my sister said, "Your pregnant? Your adopting? Your fostering?"  She kept guessing and when she got to fostering she was really crying hard (keep in mind I was trying to tell them the entire time everyone was yelling but no one could hear me over trying to guess or figure out what was going on). By the time they were able to listen to me say "fostering" my sister, dad, and mom were all crying. Pat was playing Legos with Reed and didn't know what was going on for about a full minute and all of this took place in about 25 seconds (he was a bit behind the times). 

My sister is very happy that we are doing this. She grew up around foster care even more than I did because she played with the foster care kids and our cousins because they were the same age as her when she was a kid. She knows the need for foster care and the love the kids need. My mom and dad seemed happy and  proud that we are doing this. I told them that our plans are not to adopt but that we may one day do that. They were fine with that. My mom said she would spoil all of the kids just like her other grand kids. I told them that we probably would not end up with blond haired, blue eyed kids. Both of my parents said they were fine with that. Honestly, when it comes to a reaction to this news my family reacted just like I thought they would and no future foster family going through this journey could have asked for a better response from their parents and sibling. 

My sister, Pat and I talked more about it later and they seem to be very happy for us that we are going to be helping others. Bec and Pat still haven't decided if they want to have another child yet. Becky's body has been through a lot with the car wreck and having Reed. I told them not to hurry and have a baby because the perfect child for them may come through my home and they may find their child through us. Bec said she was just thinking the same thing. 

God is good!

We love to combine our parties

Today we celebrated Easter, Reed's birthday (in Feb.) and Alea's birthday (in April) with my parents.

The kids dyed eggs, searched for eggs (twice...once inside and once outside) opened birthday presents, and we all had Easter dinner followed by birthday cake. Now that is the way to have a party!

Dying eggs.

Cousin love.

Wow! Look at that vertical! 

She was trying to reach an egg.

Happy birthday kids.

Alea and Reed helped decorate the cake! 

Happy 9th birthday Alea.

Happy 4th birthday Reed.

A picture of my fluffy love. 

My girls!

Calm and Peaceful

Davin asked me tonight how I was feeling about all of this (fostering) and the reactions we have been getting from certain people. I told him that since my emotional day on Tuesday I have had a feeling of calmness and peace laying over me like a blanket. I had a great day on Wednesday and a good day today. Becky was out sick today so I pretty much had the day to myself and my thoughts. I found that I was at peace just being and that was a wonderful feeling. I am not a person that usually feels calm and peaceful so this feeling is very nice. After my rough week last week I now feel like God has placed a blanket over me and has me under his care and protection. Negative comments about us becoming foster parents haven't been affecting me like they normally would. For those that know me they know that I don't usually talk like I have been this past week. I don't talk about God in my life, feeling called to do something, the devil, or the feeling of having a blanket of peace placed over me. I can't explain it. I don't think I have changed. I just feel like God is with me and that His peace is changing the way I handle situations and the way I feel about situations.

A Calling

I have never before in my life felt like God was calling me to do something until now. Yesterday I finally put it into words to my bosses, as I told them about our upcoming foster family journey, that I felt like God was calling us to follow this path. Last week was a rough week for me. I definitely felt the devil's presence in my life as he tried to work on me to focus on the negative. I had trouble sleeping and would lay awake at night reviewing bad times in my life and then would go to sleep to have terrible nightmares. I have always had nightmares but the frequency, quantity, and level of horror in my dreams reached a new level last week. Once I made it through the week I was able to look back and see that during this difficult time we were learning more about becoming foster parents through The C.A.L.L., a Christian-based organization, and were working as a family to become recommitted to our church. 

As I thought yesterday about this being a calling for me/us I became pretty emotional. I cried as I talked to my bosses about what we are currently undertaking and what will soon be part of our everyday lives. The idea of being called by God is new to me and very scary. I always want God to be a part of my life and to support me in my endeavors but when He knows my name and calls me specifically to do His work that is a scary thing. Yesterday I had so many emotions that I didn't even understand even though they were coming out of me all at once. Becky (from work) said that she has had a couple of times in her life when she has felt called by God to do something she maybe didn't feel like she wanted to do and she said she had cried about it too and felt uncertain. The confirmation that I was not crazy for crying and worrying about something I was actively pursuing helped me feel more normal. 

Today on my way to work I felt so much more free. I felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I haven't felt this kind of peace and calmness since I had a shot of steroids in the hip a few weeks ago; the clarity I had the next day and the level of energy I had was way above normal.. That is how I felt today too. Clear and calm. 

Davin and I both feel like this is something we are suppose to do. We do not know where this journey will take us or when it will end. We think we may have one or two children and the decide that this isn't something we can do and our foster care journey will be over. On the other hand, we might be foster parents for the next 20 years and host several children through our home. We may fall in love with the first child that comes into our house who has his/her parental rights terminated and we may adopt that child, or we may not feel that way about a child until we have hosted our 100th child, or we may never feel that way and will only foster. 

Pray for us as we attempt to do God's work by loving on children who need love and may not be able to or know how to return it.

IHC

We had our first IHC (In Home Consultation) today to get started on our paperwork to become foster parents. Our home inspection went well. She told us we needed a fire extinguisher in the kitchen so Davin went to get the one out of the garage to show her and see if it was the right kind. When Davin walked into the kitchen our resource worker took one look at it and said, "Ummmm...those things have expiration dates." I think the HUGE amount of dust on it gave it away that it was old. Davin said, "I bet it's still good." He checked the date...it expired it 2001. Oops. Time to get a new one. :)

While we were there she tried to convince us to take a teenager and a baby. I know from watching the news that she is talking about a 14 year old that just had a baby (I know the father is Marshallese so I bet the mom is too and that she was taken from her home because the parents allowed it to happen. As an ESOL teacher I have seen this happen more than once to very young girls. It seems to be "cultural".) I had to remind her we weren't an open home yet. I think she was just kidding. I think. One thing we learned is that social workers don't have many reasons to laugh in their jobs so they don't seem to appreciate humor. That is a hard one for Davin because he uses humor so often, but even he learned quickly to give straight answers without the humor.

They asked us if we were excited about starting this journey and were looking forward to it. I looked at Davin to see what he would say thinking he would look at me and we would construct our answer with our eyes (like old married people do) before we gave an answer. When I looked at him he was shaking his head enthusiastically and looking at our resource worker. He said he was excited and looking forward to it. I am still so surprised how gun-ho he is about this. I usually come up with the crazy ideas and he just follows along. He really seems to be excited and on board and this really seems to be a mutual decision for us.

Here we go....

Project Zero

http://www.theprojectzero.org/index.php/about/gtku/mission

Aging Out

http://www.theprojectzero.org/index.php/blog/203-aging-out

According to this Project Zero article there are 20,000 children who age out of foster care every year in the U.S. This means that 20,000 children enter the world at the age of 18 without a family to call their own. That breaks my heart.

I have always had a heart for older children in foster care because I know that adoptive parents want babies to adopt. I believe that one day we may adopt a teenager but I do not feel that that will happen until Alea is older. But, as I have learned this past week...you can tell God your plans and he will sit back and laugh. I knew years ago that I wanted to foster children. Davin was on board with me right away because he was around foster care just like I was (due to dating at a young age he was around the foster care in my extended family just like I was). I thought that we would start fostering when Alea was about 13 and that we would get children into our home that were younger than her and that one day we would foster mostly teenagers (after Alea went off to college).

God puts people into our lives for a reason and knowing my heart for foster care God gave me Haley and her desire to see children in foster homes instead of in group homes. Thanks to Haley's connection with fostering, DHS, and The C.A.L.L. we have started on our fostering journey weeks away from Alea's 9th birthday. God knew my plans and decided to remind me the plans that He has for me aren't always on my timeline.

We serve an awesome God. Please pray for us as we begin this journey. Please pray for the children that are entering the system each day, the children currently in the system, the children who are aging out of the system waiting for forever families, and for the children that will touch our family directly.

Olympus Has Fallen

Davin and I went to see the movie "Olympus Has Fallen" tonight while Alea was at a sleepover birthday party for one of her BFFs. It was an amazing movie. In the past year I have started following the news more and find myself more concerned for our country and the threats to our country and way of life as a nation. This movie terrified me in the reality of what could so easily become fact. It makes me want to prepare my home and family for the unexpected emergencies that could face at a moments notice. If you get a chance to watch this movie I would highly recommend it.

Hosea 14:3

Hosea 14:3

"In you the orphan finds mercy."

Psalms 68:5-6

Psalms 68:5-6

"Father to the fatherless, defender of widows--this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families."

Proverbs 31:8-9

Proverbs 31:8-9

"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up  for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice."

Isaiah 1:17

Isaiah 1:17

"Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the right of widows."

Matthew 25:40

Matthew 25:40

"I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!"

James 1:27

James 1:27

"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you."

Matthew 18:5

Matthew 18:5

"For anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me."

Spring Cleaning While It's Snowing Outside

Yesterday I did a deep cleaning of our bedroom. Wow! It needed it. Today I got a call from DCFS (Department of Children and Family Services) and they are doing our IHC (In Home Consultation...there are a lot of acronyms used in this system) tomorrow at 3pm. Today I didn't have any plans (I've shopped every store in NW Arkansas this week so it was finally stay at home and do nothing day) so today turned into a spring cleaning day. Our guest bedroom closest is one of those closets you hope no one ever sees because it was so bad. It is so much better now. I've added items to our garage sale pile, created a tote of Alea's dance outfits, first day of school clothes, and sports uniforms to take to the attic as well as a tote of Alea's school papers that can go to the attic. Davin will be so excited when he comes home to find that he gets to drag totes up to the attic (NOT!).

It has been snowing huge flakes all afternoon. I think it is turning to rain out there. Nothing like spring cleaning while it is snowing out.

A New Journey

Last night Davin and I went to an informational meeting for The C.A.L.L. We learned more about what is required to become an open foster home. We planned to attend the 4 weekend day classes (30 hours) in April but one of the dates conflicted with one of my nieces birthday parties. When I talked to my sister-in-law about missing the party...well...it didn't go over well. ;) They do not have a training in May and we are on our cruise in June so we are now signed up for the July training. In the mean time we will have an in home consultation that will tell us what we need to do to get our home up to the standards for fostering (locked medicines, gun cabinet..Davin has been wanting one for a long time, etc.). We will also be working on our paperwork packet.

Here is what The CALL (Children in Arkansas Loved for a Lifetime) is all about.

Who We Are

An exciting Foster Care Church Initiative has rapidly emerged as churches are joining together with an unprecedented level of support from the top levels of leadership of the Arkansas DHHS’ Division of Children and Family Services.  This Christian non-profit is named The CALL -- Children of Arkansas Loved for a Lifetime -- because of God's call on the Church: "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress..." James 1:27.

Why did we form? There is a desperate need for more foster, adoptive and respite care homes for children in the Arkansas foster care system.For instance, there are about 7,000 children in foster care in Arkansas within a year, and there are only about 950 foster families available to care for those children!  Plus, there are over 500 children and teens available for adoption through foster care in our state. Those numbers alone are an indication that this situation is in crisis. We must find more loving homes for these hurting children.

Our Mission

To educate, equip and encourage the Christian community to provide a future and a hope for the children in foster care.

Our Vision

To have no waiting children in Arkansas foster care, but instead to have waiting, Christian families ready to take them in!

This is truly a God-sized vision. God is moving as things continue to fall into place quickly and barriers from the past have been overcome. It is nothing short of miraculous!! It is obvious that He wants these hurting children cared for…now.  As Christian families responded to "The CALL" in Pulaski County, this model is now being applied in various counties statewide across Arkansas!

The CALL is unique because it provides the opportunity for prospective foster, adoptive, and respite care parents to go through state-approved training WITHIN a church setting. They will have an automatic “support group” as they go through training with other Christians. Plus, The CALL will walk them through every step in the process, easing the burden on these prospective foster and adoptive parents. We have a church liaison within the state agency who will help in making sure these homes are opened in a timely manner. Then, once they have invited a child into their home, The C.A.L.L. encourages support from their local church family.

Currently, we have a coalition of representatives from more than fifty Pulaski County Christian churches of varying denominations and it is constantly growing.  The CALL is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization, and is governed by a Board of Directors from various churches around Arkansas. Your prayers are greatly needed for this initiative -- that God will move in the hearts of His people to step out in faith and care for the hurting children in foster care. It is clear from James 1:27 that He calls us, as His followers, to reach out to them in love.

Foster Care and Adoption Articles

Four Little Words

http://www.momlifetoday.com/2012/02/four-little-words/

How a Foster Mom Says Goodbye

http://www.momlifetoday.com/2012/11/how-a-foster-mom-says-good-bye/

Goodbye, Empty Nest

http://www.momlifetoday.com/2012/05/goodbye-empty-nest/

Won't My Biological Kids Be Effected By Foster Care

http://themiddlemom.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/wont-my-biological-kids-be-effected-by-foster-care/

Happy St. Patty's Day

Square Dancing

Today was rhythm day at school. Alea's grade has been learning how to square dance. She decided to wear a cute skirt to school today but at the last minute asked me if she could wear tennis shoes instead of sandals. She told me her partner isn't a very good dancer and steps on her feet a lot. :) I asked her when she got home in Grant had stepped on her feet during the performance. She said, "YES!"

Before we left the house Alea asked if I was going to be able to come watch the performance today. I told her I couldn't. She said, "Good! It's embarrassing!"

Foster Care

Wow!

Emailing

Since Davin has been out of town he and Alea have been emailing each other. Last night Alea sent him an email before bed from her Nexus. A few minutes later she came into my room very concerned. She said she wanted to read something to me. She said she had emailed her daddy and that someone else she didn't know had emailed her back. She wanted to read me the email. In her most freaked out voice she read this email, "I am out of the office all week. If you need assistance please contact Dean @ ____." I smiled and told her this was an out of office reply from her daddy and explained to her what that meant. She was relieved. She told me she was going to write back and say, "Who is this!!" but then she remembered Mrs. Emerson had told her if someone you don't know emails you that you should never email them back and that you should tell an adult so that is what she did.

I was so proud of her for talking to me about this and for not responding to a "stranger" on line. (I also thought it was pretty funny and cute.)

 

South Carolina/Sick/and Hoarders

Davin is back in South Carolina this week. Of course I've developed sore throat. Today I saw a white spot in the back of my throat. The school nurse said she thought it was strep so I left work and went to Urgent Care. The doctor did a strep test and it came back negative and he thought it was allergies. He gave me a double shot in the hip. The first part of the shot was suppose to help me start feeling better in 3 hours and the other half of the shot to help me feel better slowly, kicking in fully in 3 days.

The shot seems to have helped because I feel much better tonight. I came home after the doctor (in case he was wrong about the strep and because my throat still hurt). I was very tired and wanted to take a nap, but I don't sleep well when Davin isn't home so I didn't want another night of not sleeping well so I stayed up and watched a "Hoarders" marathon.

Alea is usually a blubbering, crying mess when Davin is out of town. I told her tonight I was so proud of her for holding it together this week. She has been loving on a stuffed puppy dog and calling it Daddy. I think that has helped her a lot. She did have a blubbering cry fest on Sunday night but has been much better since then. No tears!

Last Week

Last week Sunday Joe, Danica, and their family came down to visit with Tim and Jo (and us I guess:). Most of the afternoon Tim was in pain. After a while of this he said he needed to go to the hospital. Davin took his parents to the Veterans hospital and they admitted him for a bowel obstruction. He ended up staying at the VA until Thursday. I felt much better about him coming home when he came home on Thursday than I did the week before when he left Washington Regional on Wednesday. Tim and Jo stayed at our house Thursday night and then stayed home Friday with Alea because she wasn't feeling well. They went to their home on Friday afternoon when Davin got off of work. 

Tim has lost 10 more pounds so he has lost 20 pounds so far. I think he is getting better. He still has his drain   in but it is draining a lot less now. They are hoping to be able to make a trip back down soon to get the drain out. It was a crazy two weeks!

Volleyball Tournament

The girls lost their first two games at the tournament today. Since the tournament was double elimination they were done pretty quickly. The are such a sweet group of girls! I am proud of their hard work this season!

Way to go Huskies!

2013 Cookie Booth

We had a great booth sale today. The store manager let us sell cookies inside the store since it was only 30 degrees outside. We even sold out an hour early! 

The girls did a great job and every girl in our troop participated. 

The girls worked two hour shifts. 

Alea and Nat worked the entire time (5 hours). Way to go girls.

Daddy/Daughter time at cookie booth.

Tim Update

Tim was dismissed from the hospital on Wednesday. He is still in a lot of pain and has a lot of issues going on still but he is at our house resting. I went to work on Thursday and am home today with Tim and Jo. Tim had a follow up appointment today at the VA so I drove them to Fayetteville for the appointment. He is still draining a lot so they are going to leave the drain in until at least Tuesday so Tim and Jo are going to stay with us until Tuesday. Davin is suppose to be home in an hour or so from his South Carolina trip.

Tomorrow Alea has a volleyball tournament and I have our Girl Scout cookie booth from 12-6 so we will be busy tomorrow. Tim and Jo will hang out at our house and rest all day. Danica and her family might come down on Sunday for a visit. I have gotten some cleaning done today around the house so that is nice.