Alea knows we are getting closer to opening our home to a foster child or children and I think it is conflicting her mind and heart. Her mind is worried that some of her attention and fun will go away (we talked today about how that will probably happen but that she just needs to be honest with us when she needs extra attention. I told her that we can get a babysitter and do just the 3 of us time or that we can do daddy/daughter dates or mommy/daughter dates while the other parent stays home with the other child/ren.)
Her heart is so ready to love and help. As I work around the house to get ready for our new addition she keeps telling me she wants to help get the kid room ready. I'm not really ready to work in there yet but she really wants to help. Yesterday and today she has been very concerned about the child having a birthday while he/she is with us. She asked what we would do if the kid was with us when it was his/her birthday. I told her we would celebrate the birthday the best we could with the three of us and that we would probably invite Bec and Pat to celebrate with us (I didn't mention Davin's family even though they usually celebrate birthdays with us and she didn't bring them up either). Today she asked me what we would do if we got a kid and the very next day was his/her birthday. I told her we would celebrate the best we could. I told her we could go out to dinner maybe and then give the child presents and/or let him/her pick out something at Wal*Mart. I can't tell if my answers are good enough for her but she just seems to ponder them each time we talk about this. Birthdays are so huge to Alea. I think she wants to make sure the child gets a birthday but maybe deep down wants to make sure the birthday isn't more awesome than hers (I don't know that for sure, but that is how I would have thought about it when I was 9 years old).
Today we had a talk about how the process works. I talked to her more about why a child might come into foster care and how the parent has to work their plan to get their child back. I talked to her about parenting classes, moving out of a house that other bad people lived in, rehab, etc.. I told her that the court usually gives the parent one year to work their plan and get things back in order so they can have their child back. I told her that if we got a child about the time school started that we would probably have the child until school started back next year. I also told her that sometimes people have a foster child for two years or two days but that we will never know the plan until it happens. She seemed to understand all of that. I think she just wants to get a kid so she can stop wondering and worrying and just figure out (good or bad) what it is going to be like.
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